January Reviews

Happy new year! Happy inauguration! Happy anything else we're celebrating the first month of 2021! Wow, what a month. Normally I feel like January flies by, but 2021 January felt almost like 2020 November. That did, however, make it feel like I had plenty of time to read.

Let's jump right in!

A Universe of Wishes Anthology edited by Dhonielle Clayton

I have a lot of trouble with anthologies, which I think is often because I get so drawn into a story that I want more of it, or it feels like as soon as I get into the story it moves on to a completely different one. I suppose I was built for novels, not short stories. That being said, I really did enjoy the stories featured in this anthology, especially since the purpose was to have queer authors and authors of color tell diverse stories.

Since this was an anthology, I can't really give a summary for all fifteen short stories present in this collection, but they were all fantastical in some way, whether through a fairy tale retelling, modern magic, or a futuristic scientific adventure. This is the fourth book in their collection of We need Diverse Books anthologies, and I must admit it's made me very curious to check out the others. I chose this one because of all the authors names I recognized and loved. Anna-Marie McLemore, Nic Stone, Tara Sim, and V. E. Schwab were all ones that I recognized and was excited to read, but I was also introduced to some really good writers who's other works I'll also be checking out.

Similar to not being able to write a summary, it's hard to write a review for something that is essentially a collection of different writers' short stories. I liked some more than others, but that's the nature of this sort of thing, but there weren't any that I outright disliked. Some of them stuck with me longer than others, but I'd always pause between stories, to give both me and the book time to adjust, to process, before moving on. Every author included in this anthology is talented, and I loved having the opportunity to sample a lot of different peoples' works, even if it felt strange to only linger for a little while.

This will be a short review, because it's either than or write fifteen different reviews, and I don't want to write that as much as you don't want to read that. So check out this anthology if you like fantasy and sci-fi, but you like it even more with queer characters and characters of color.

Similar to: the only other anthology I've ever read was Feral Youth, and that had a very different vibe than this one did. I would say it's more similar to things the authors represented in it have written

The House in the Cerulean Sea by TJ Klune

Do you ever finish a book and feel like you're filled with so much love that you don't know what to do with it? And then you're expected to continue with your life and go to work and write emails like your heart is ready to burst in your chest? That's what this book was like.

Linus Baker is a case worker for DICOMY, the Department In Charge of Magical Youths, known for his impartiality and honesty. So when he's assigned a rather unusual case, Extremely Upper Management has high hopes that he'll be the one to give them exactly what they need. Linus, armed with his cat and a copy of Rules and Regulations, heads to an orphanage on an island in the sea, not sure what to expect. What he finds is a the antichrist and a handful of other strange children, all under the protection of Arthur Parnassus. During his month there, Linus learns all sorts of things, but most importantly he learns that a family can be many things, even something he didn't know he was missing.

I love TJ Klune's writing. I've said it before and I'll probably say it with every book of his I read. It's so wonderful to have such a cheerfully queer author telling cheerfully queer stories with such a delightful and poetic prose. All my reviews for Klune sound the same because he has such a specific and wonderful way of writing, even when the stories are so creative and vastly different. His humor punches and he makes you cry, sometimes in a sad way, sometimes in a happy way, and honestly I did happy cry while reading this book. It's been a rough several months, and this book was like a little love letter for my soul.

The characters in this book are truly something else. Most of them are children, but all of them are delightful and found a place in my heart as I read, Lucy especially, which isn't something I ever thought I'd say about the antichrist. It was magical, and not just because the characters were literally magical or because the setting was an island, but because it was a story made of people who love so, so much. There was hate too, and the whole thing was this great extended metaphor (what's it called? Allegory, that's it! Shout out to Pilgrim's Progress for no other reason than teaching me that) for acceptance, and that meant battling it out with some angry and intolerant folks. But this book handled it with grace and humanity in such a way that anyone of any age could read it.

I'll try not to make this too long, because otherwise I'll just spend the whole time gushing about love and sunlight vs rain and spiders in the brain and philosophy discussions about how things aren't black and white but shades of grey, even if they seem abhorrent. So I'm just going to say that I may have already found my favorite book of 2021 (only the second one I've read too!) and call it a day.

Similar to: ugh I don't even know, it was just so wholesome and wonderful, I don't know that I've ever read anything like it

Clap When You Land by Elizabeth Acevedo

This book was not what I expected, both in plot and in format, but will certainly leave a lasting impression on me.

Camino and Yahaira have one thing in common and live an ocean apart, never knowing the other exists. Their dad flies between them, living two separate lives with two separate families, one in the Dominican Republic and the other in New York. Then his plane goes down in the ocean and both girls suddenly lose their father, only to learn of this betrayal and existence all at once. Camino dreams of medical school in the United States, of coming to America with her father while afraid of the man that roams her streets, picking up shiny young girls. Yahaira stopped playing chess when she learned about her father's other marriage, but she never expected to find a sister across the very ocean that killed her father. The only thing the other has left of their dad, their journey to each other is filled with enough pain to fill an ocean, and neither of them know how to cross it.

Clap When You Land is written entirely in verse, with short and long poems making up each section of each chapter, spaced and stylized to reflect both main characters. I was surprised when I opened the book, and, if I'm being completely honest, a little bit put off. I'm not much of poet, but the way this was written, in a poetic style but not drowning in too much rhyming and nonsensical verse, was absolutely stunning. Poetry is all about saying as much in you can in as few words as possible, and this book did that, packing a punch that I'm still reeling from.

Camino and Yahaira are so different and so similar, and getting to read from both their perspectives shaped this book. Their outside relationships and then tentative relationship with one another created such a specific mood that I could feel the book sitting on my chest even when I wasn't reading it. And the descriptions and variants between the two locations, New York and the Dominican Republic, made everything feel very specific to these girls. Yahaira was packed in tight, her emotions shoved deep down beneath the New York concrete, where Camino arced through the waves, her feelings pouring from her until she couldn't hold them in anymore. They were both selfish, both grieving, and ultimately exactly what the other person needed.

There was quite a bit of Spanish in this book, and while I didn't get all of it, most of it was manageable through context clues or my very, very poor Spanish skills. I think reading a book with two languages and so entrenched in such a rich culture makes for a very powerful story, especially when it's about straddling two places and living two lives.

I also loved that Yahaira had a girlfriend, Dre, who loved and supported her, and it was just accepted. There was no homophobia in this book expressed by the characters, just a teenage relationship that was actually very healthy.

This story has a lot of complicated pieces to it, and both girls have experienced loss in multiple ways. There are two instances of assault in this book, but not graphic, just enough information to convey the kind of things these girls have been through, the kinds of things that can leave you shaking in a world that just tells you that is the norm. This was not a gentle book, but it had soft moments, moments of connection and power and culture, and it was really very fun to read. I sped through it, for how many pages it has, and I think the formatting had a lot to do with that.

Overall, this wasn't what I expected, but I enjoyed it so much more than I thought I would.

Similar to: see the problem is I keep reading new books that are unlike anything I've read before. The closest I can compare would maybe be What I Leave Behind by Alison McGhee?

The Duke and I by Julia Quinn

I did it. I watched the Netflix series and was talked into actually reading the book as part of a book club with some friends. And I have some regrets.

I'm not even gonna write a summary of this book. I don't know that I could do it in a coherent and interesting way. It was a fake dating regency story with many bad decisions and a happy ending. That's all I got.

Okay, so, disclaimer, I really did like the Netflix series (for the most part). The first five episodes were *chef kiss*. They had yearning, fake dating, regency shenanigans, modern music but orchestral, and a love confession that melted even my heart. I even managed to not roll my eyes too much over the boning montage in episode six, mostly because I liked the song they played over it. But then things got...well, if you've seen the show or heard the conversations regarding the unfortunate inclusion of marital rape, you'll know what I'm talking about. There are some other things about the show that are questionable and things they did well. But this review isn't about the Netflix series, it's about the romance novel that inspired it. And while there were A Lot of differences that made the show much more enjoyable than the book, the core of the story was still the same.

I think beyond the glaring consent issue (and my rage with Daphne for the rest of the book. It was literally "Daphne being treated as a victim and only feeling kind of bad for what she did and Simon basically being forced to just get over it" *kill bill sirens*) my other main issue was....I'm reading a romance novel as an asexual, and so many moments just Do Not make sense to me. Allosexuals, are you guys okay? Simon's introduction to Daphne included her laughing at something and him getting Ridiculously Horny and Turn On By It, which, what?? I get that this is a romance novel and horny characters are a requirement, but I literally couldn't wrap my head around most of the "sexy" moments, and skipped over the sex scenes entirely.

Honestly, I had voted for our book club to skip to the second book, since the Netflix series covers the whole first book, and I stand by that decision, especially after reading the book. I actually sat down and read it all in one day just to get it over with. All my favorite parts from the Netflix series (Eloise and Benedict being queer coded and incredible, Marina and Penelope's rivalry and dilemma, Penelope herself, the queen, basically any characters that weren't Daphne or Simon) were essentially non existent in the book. I understand that the show had to make some changes, but basically all the really good stuff was made up, leaving the book as only a sad shadow of basic familiarity and horny white people.

Regrettably, I have committed to reading at least the next two books, potentially the entire series. I have a kindle version of the first three, which is why it isn't pictured above, and which also may have added to my disgruntled opinion of the book because I hate reading books in kindle format. So, I guess we'll see if the others are any better, formatting or not.

Similar to: The Girl With the Make-Believe Husband by Julia Quinn, the only other romance novel I have ever read in my life, ironically considered a prequel adjacent to the Bridgerton series

Reverie by Ryan la Sala

I'd seen this book recommended on several sites and actually picked it up right before the holidays, but it took me until now to read it.

Kane doesn't remember anything from his accident, if it could even be called that. But it isn't until a girl from school, Ursula, claims that they were friends that Kane's life starts to really twist, and then he's thrown into the magical world of reveries, day dreams come to life. Kane is the only one who can unravel them, with the help of a handful of others ludic enough to remember themselves within the daydream world. But things get complicated, and Kane isn't sure who to trust: these supposed friends who can't remember, or a drag queen with more power than Kane can even imagine. Stuck in a place that feels more like lies than truth, Kane has to determine who he was in order to survive.

This book had so much magic in it, both in storytelling and in actual plot. The concept is incredibly creative, and I sort of feel like I haven't read a book with such technical worldbuilding (literally), in a long time. This book took the idea of "it was all a dream" and made it a non-tropey, original, queer story, one where the dreams became a dangerous reality.

The characters are fascinating and very self aware, if their theories about their powers stemming from their greatest weaknesses and insecurities is true. I like that some of their interactions and decisions were unexpected. Kane didn't remember them, but they certainly knew him, and that was such a wild and fresh dynamic to witness. Posey the drag queen in particular was so interesting. I didn't know whether to trust her or not, and sort of expected there to be a twist in every interaction, and there was, but never in the direction I suspected. This book kept me on my toes and continuously looking for the next answer right along with the characters.

This book was fabulously queer, with everything from Kane's rainbow powers to the drag queen to the majority of the relationships present in the story. The idea of turning to a world of your own creation in order to escape a reality rife with fear and prejudice is essentially a queer rite of passage, and sort of a love letter to anyone who has ever thought they could be safer in their own mind than in the world around them.

la Sala has a fun way of approaching even serious things, and I highly recommend this book for anyone who would, at any point in life, classify themselves as a dreamer.

Similar to: The Last Bus to Everland by Sophie Cameron and All The Crooked Saints by Maggie Stiefvater

The Good Girls by Claire Eliza Bartlett

Do you ever read a book or an article or listen to a song and feel yourself fill to the brim with female rage, but in like a good way? Like, yes, this is my anger, I will bare my teeth and bite, so stay back and be afraid? This book is that but also a murder mystery thriller, and that was a heart-pounding spectacular combination.

After the murder of a high school girl rocks a small Colorado town, three of her classmates are pulled into the investigation. The preppy cheerleader, the would-be valedictorian, and the party girl, all connected in some way to the murdered girl, but not in the way the police think. What really happened should be obvious, if the clues can be found in time, before another girl is lost.

I don't read a lot of thrillers, murder mystery or otherwise, but I will be eternally grateful that of all the ones I could've read, this was the one I was given. The story is told in snippets of police reports and interviews interspersed with a narrative that will keep you turning pages. I couldn't put this book down, both because of the twisty plot and how the languages used by the girls to describe their experiences and thoughts and changes was just so....it really hit the nail on the head, especially living as a female-presenting human in a world where male-presenting humans can take a lot of liberties and zero blame.

The characters were all categorized as something by both the police and the townsfolk, and while those labels were used to both hurt and help them, the girls were so much more than that. Avery, Claude, and Gwen were so much more than they seemed, and getting to follow their story was so, so cool. The complexities and genius of teenage girls is often overlooked by literally everyone, especially when dealing with something as unfortunately common as sexual assault. All these young women were brought together by the same shitty dude, and this was like, a very windy revenge fantasy that I want to keep reading. More books about girls rising against their abusers and society finally believing them please.

That being said, this book does take on some very serious topics. Nothing is explicit, but it is frank with what happened to this girls and how it has affected them. In addition to rape and sexual assault, there's also an eating disorder, unhealthy parent-children relationships of several kinds, drug and alcohol use, talk of suicide, and attempted murder. It's all handled well, in my opinion, or at least as well as some of these things can be handled.

I also appreciated the queer presence in this book! Avery is an out bisexual and Gwen is a lesbian. The relationships between all of the girls is complicated and twisty, keeping the reader guessing what will come next between them just as much as the murder investigation. I was concerned I wouldn't like this book, but I'm so pleased to say I was, pun intended, dead wrong.

Similar to: Moxie by Jennifer Mathieu and All The Missing Girls by Megan Miranda

The Henna Wars by Adiba Jaigirdar

This story was very cute and gay, but also really important in terms of representation and identity.

Nishat just came out to her parents and it didn't go well. They want her to choose something else, to be proud of her Bengali roots, rather than become something they would be ashamed of. On top of that, there's a beautiful new girl at school, named Flavia, and Nishat feels drawn to her. But then, in a school business competition, Nishat and Flavia both decide to create their own Henna business, and as the competition heats up, Nishat feels she has to choose between her family and culture, and giving her true self a chance.

Nishat and her family are from Bengal, moving to Ireland when Nishat was little, and let me tell you, it was really cool to read about an immigrant family in a country that wasn't America. I love stories about diversity and families immigrating to new countries, but to see it in an Irish setting was both familiar and new. Ireland is still a predominantly white country, and there are other similarities to America, but ultimately it was different from a traditional American story.

I loved getting to read about Nishat's family and culture, especially the henna art. I was also full of a lot of feelings about her sexuality and how her family and peers dealt with that. Spoiler alert, but her parents found their way in the end, but it was a tense time before then, especially after Nishat got outed at school.

Her schoolmates were terrible, especially Chyna. I was so mad at so many people during this book, but I also know my second-hand anger is nothing compared to the actual racism and homophobia that people experience. Even Nishat's friends had moments of being racist.

This is also a book on cultural appropriation, because Flavia was Brazilian and decided to do henna, unable to see why that was bad even after Nishat told her. And it only escalated from there with Flavia's white cousin, Chyna. Flavia did eventually understand what she did wrong, though, and we love learning moments and accepting being wrong in order to be better.

Nishat's relationship with her sister, Priti, was super sweet. They had a very realistic relationship with their friendship and fighting, how ultimately they were ride or die, even when doing admittedly dumb or ridiculous things.

Overall, I know my review talked a lot about the bad experiences, but this was a genuinely very sweet book, and I would recommend it.

Similar to: Tell Me Again How A Crush Should Feel by Sara Farizan and You Should See Me In A Crown by Leah Johnson

Permanent Record by Mary H K Choi

I really liked Choi's first book, Emergency Contact, but it took me a while to get my hands on a copy of this book, purely for paperback is cheaper than hardcover reasons.

Pablo is a college crop out dripping with debt, working nights at a New York bodega. When beyond famous pop star Leanna Smart walks into that same bodega at 5am, everything changes. The two of them connect in a blindingly fast and furious courtship, fueled by Lee's insane life and Pablo's drifting listlessness. As they each try to figure out what they want from life and who they want to be, they turn towards each other and the complicated balance of reality and social media.

This book was....difficult for me to get into, but that is completely on me. Pablo's restlessness and fear of facing reality just kinda struck a nerve, and I think I was almost afraid to read it for a while because I wanted so badly to not be stuck in Pablo's debt and inactive vortex. He wanted to live in his fantasy with Lee, where it was just the two of them and no one else, but that's not how life works. He got it together by the end, but it was rough going. Choi has a way of making everything feel very real, even the surreal or strange moments. Her characters and descriptions are bold and startlingly honest, especially when they mess up or are afraid. It's as refreshing as it is terrifying.

Lee and Pablo's relationship was quite the ride, trying to squeeze in moments between all the things she was doing for work and all the pitfalls that come with fame. Pablo has a really stunning realization towards the end of the book about Lee and how her life is orchestrated, but before that there's really an avoidant film over the entire story. Pablo refuses to look at the truth, until he can no longer look away from it, and that is a very hard story to face. Choi is a really talented writer, and while I will admit I liked Emergency Contact more, this one was very good too.

The characters in this book are diverse and strange and real, from Pablo's family and roommates to the strange celebrity folks surrounding Lee. Conversations are hilarious or painful or sometimes both, riding the edge of self realization and intervention as often as they are rose gold and pretending. Pablo's complex relationship with each of his parents and his little brother made even tense moments full of yearning, for a connection or forgiveness or something.

This review feels super incoherent, I'm sorry. I hit a weird point about halfway through this book where I just, I don't know, maybe felt tired of reading? My own restlessness got to me, and that's affecting both how I read the book and write the review. This book was good, that's it.

Similar to: Emergency Contact by Mary H K Choi, of course, and What I Like About You by Marisa Kanter

And that's that! The first few reads of 2021. I think it's set me up for a good year of reading, and I can't wait to see what else this year has in store.

Reading recommendation: Emergency Contact by Mary H.K. Choi

Media recommendation: I know literally nothing about Machine Gun Kelly, but I've been listening to his and Halsey's song forget me too on repeat for most of January. His whole album Tickets to my Downfall is pretty good, even if I don't know any of the words and have just been really into angry guitar music lately